139: The biggest mistakes Americans make when choosing a country abroad

Most people choose a country before they understand what kind of life they actually want. They fall in love with a destination and try to force their life into it. But moving abroad is not a vacation. It is real life. And the country that makes the best vacation destination is not always the country that makes the best home.

In this episode, I am walking through the wrong way to choose a country abroad and the questions you should be asking instead.

Here is what we are covering:

• Why your vacation experience is not the best way to choose a country to live in
• How to test drive a city abroad before you commit
• Why social media is lying to you about what life abroad actually looks like
• The difference between asking where should I move and what kind of life do I want
• Why visa reality needs to be part of your decision from the start
• A simple framework for actually choosing the right country for you

If you have been going down the research rabbit hole for months, this episode will help you stop spinning and start choosing with clarity.

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Website: jordangiberson.com
Instagram: @jordan.giberson

Transcript

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A lot of times people fall in love with a destination and then try to force their life into it, and that's one of the biggest mistakes the country that makes the best vacation destination is not always the country that makes the best home. stop asking yourself where should I move, instead start asking what kind of life do I want? Hey, my name is Jordan Giberson. I'm a Texas girl living and thriving in London. The best thing I've ever done? Moving abroad, hands down. And I'm passionate about helping others do the same. Are you curious about finding a job abroad? You're in the right place, friend. I'll teach you the tried and true secrets of how to make moving abroad a reality for you and how to live a fulfilling life once you get there. We'll cover topics like choosing the best visa for you, how to get a job offer in another country, how to get over your fear of moving abroad, and how to live a life you love once you get there, this is The Move Abroad Podcast. Welcome to another episode of the Move Abroad Podcast. Today we're talking about the wrong way to choose a country abroad, or some of the biggest mistakes that people make whenever they choose a country abroad. A lot of Americans might start with, "Oh, I loved Italy on my vacation," or, "I've always dreamed of Paris." But sometimes those are not often the best reasons to choose a country for a long-term move is whenever you visited somewhere and you loved your experience. Because to live somewhere and to visit somewhere on vacation can be completely different experiences. So I'm hoping that this episode could be a bit of an aha moment for you, where you might be realizing that you've been asking yourself the wrong questions in terms of where you should be building your life abroad and where you should choose to move to. Because I think that a lot of times people fall in love with a destination and then try to force their life into it, and that's one of the biggest mistakes that I see people making whenever they plan a move abroad is choosing the country before they're understanding what kind of life they actually want. Because again, moving abroad is not a vacation. It's real life, and sometimes what you need in your real life is different than what you need on vacation and what makes the destination fit a vacation better or real life better Because the country that makes the best vacation destination is not always the country that makes the best home. So today we're going to walk through the wrong way to choose a country abroad, and the questions that I think that you should be asking yourself instead. So let's go ahead and get started with today's episode. So I think that one of the first mistakes that people make whenever they're choosing a country abroad is to choose based on their vacation experience. Vacation mode is not necessarily real life. We're enjoying going on tours, and seeing some old ruins, and going to get ice cream all the time, and constantly going into cafes, but you're not experiencing what the city center might look like if you are to work in the city. Or, you're eating out every meal and not cooking at home, so to experience what the grocery stores might look like. You don't have normal work stress. You're not dealing with bureaucracy. That's a really big one. And I think that some examples, like we said, is that Italy could be amazing for two weeks, but to live, there's a lot of bureaucracy in Italy. Or for example, in Paris, you might think that's a really great place, but in terms of living and acclimating to the city, maybe it's not the best fit. Maybe it could be, but maybe it's not. But I think that's what we're evaluating in today's episode. So I think something that you should be asking yourself is if you had to work a full-time job there, you had to rent an apartment, you had to deal with taxes, normal life stuff like doing your laundry and all the things that you have to do in life, going grocery shopping every week, would you still choose that location? And I think that one of the best ways to test this out is would I choose this if it weren't just a vacation? Would I like real life here? Is to stop vacationing there and start test driving I think that this is one of the most important things that you should be doing before you move abroad, is to do a test drive of your city abroad that you're planning on moving to. Because I think that a lot of people visit a city like a tourist, they experience it like a tourist, but if you're thinking about moving abroad, you need to start experiencing places through a different lens. Not just what I enjoy visiting here, but could I build a life here? Whenever you're on vacation, you're asking questions like, is the food good, and are the sights beautiful, and am I having fun, and could I do this on the weekend maybe? But whenever you're evaluating a future home, you should be asking things like, could I afford to live here? Could I find good housing? What would my daily routine look like and would I enjoy it? Could I make friends and build community here? Super, super, super important. Could I imagine myself here in February on a rainy Tuesday, for instance? Because these are really different questions. Even for me, this is a bit of a different circumstance, but in London I was looking to move to a different neighborhood probably like a year and a half ago now, and I remember thinking like, oh, I love Chelsea and I love Notting Hill, but could I live there? What would it look like if I went there instead of a lens of am I gonna have fun, then... So I went there with a lens of could I live here instead of do I just have fun in this area. And as I walked around like South Kensington and Chelsea, those two neighborhoods, I was like, I don't actually like the idea of living here. This is such a busy street. It's so hectic. There's no good gyms that I really like nearby. It's really expensive in terms of the housing. I just didn't love the feel of the people as much. It just wasn't really me. I think I was really craving nature, and that was also missing from those locations. So anyways, whenever I went with the lens of could I live here, I actually saw it with a really different lens, where I was like, actually, I think that visiting here is really cool and really fun, but I'd rather visit instead of build my life here. And I think that translates well for you whenever you're thinking about the city that you might want to move abroad to. Because you might have had an incredible vacation in Paris or maybe somewhere in Spain, for instance, but then whenever you visit there in person, you might be like, ah, actually because of the cost of living, or actually because of the weather, or because of a lack of job opportunities or visa opportunities for me, this might actually not be the best spot for me. Actually, I think that this place or this place might be a better place for living. Do you know what I mean? So I think that you're evaluating from a very different lens, and instead of having the vacation lens, you need to have the living lens. So I think that doing a test drive of a city abroad is one of the most important things that you can do. And I think some things to consider whenever you're doing a test drive is One, the longer that you can stay, the better, but you don't need to pressure yourself to stay a really long time. I think even a few days can give you a really good feel. The times that I've done this, I've walked around like an absolute maniac trying to do everything that I can to visit the grocery stores. What is the feel of that? You might look into the prices, the selection, the products that you buy regularly to see what real life grocery shopping in that place could be like, because that's a great indicator of something that you do in your daily life. Maybe you want to ride public transportation. Is it reliable? Is it easy to understand? Would I enjoy doing this daily? So I think those are a couple things. Maybe walking around the residential neighborhoods. I love doing this. Even when my first trip to Europe that I ever went on, I actually loved walking through the residential neighborhoods just... I don't know, I found it really interesting. So I think that it's helpful to not just go to the tourist centers, but to explore where the locals live. What does it feel like? What is the vibe, and does it fit the vibe that you're looking for? What about parks? What about cafes, gyms, everyday services that you might need I don't know, a laundromat? So I think it's just asking yourself, could I see myself living on this street, and what would that feel like? You might even consider working a normal day. Maybe you're a freelancer or a contractor, you have your own online business. Maybe you bring your laptop and work from a cafe. Maybe you try to take meetings or follow a regular routine to pretend that you're not on vacation, but pretend that it's a normal Tuesday and see what that feels like for you. Maybe you think about some of the boring stuff. Again, where would I exercise? The gym. Or, where would I buy my household items? How long would my commute be? How easy would healthcare be? And how would I build a social life? Again, super, super important is social life, I think. So I think that the boring stuff is actually the stuff that determines your everyday routine and happiness in the life that you'd be building abroad, and we wanna make sure we're choosing a location where we can have a successful move where we build a life that we love, not just one that we enjoyed on vacation, but an actual day-to-day life is not actually the best fit for us. So I think whenever you're doing this test drive abroad, I think I would stop asking yourself if you're just enjoying it as a vacation, but to instead ask yourself, "Could I build a sustainable life here?" Because moving abroad is not just about creating the perfect vacation, it's about creating a life that still will feel good to you six months later, one year later, and perhaps even five years later or more. Who knows? We might be moving abroad until further notice. You never know. So I think you just wanna make sure that you're building a life that you will love, and that's the whole point of doing the test drive is to really get a good feel with a lens of could I live there? I think mistake number two that people might make is to choose based on social media. I think a lot of times Instagram is showing the beach life, and cafes, and the historical streets, and the beautiful apartments, but it's not showing the visas that you'll have to get, and to make sure that there is a good fit for you. Job searches, is there a good job market there? If you're gonna be working like a 9:00 to 5:00 or to be employed somewhere. Are there housing shortages, and what would that look like? What are the salaries and the cost of living? Is there a lot of bureaucracy that would make it really difficult for me to move here? So I think a lot of times social media, it makes a place look incredible, but it's different to live there versus just a vacation. So I think you just need to make sure that you're evaluating based on a really good fit instead of based on what social media kinda sells us as like the dream vacation spots. And I think the third mistake that people make is to start with the country instead of the life first. So I think that a lot of people ask, where should I move, instead of what kind of life do I want? So I think that also comes down to the reasons why we're moving abroad. Maybe you're moving for your career. Maybe you're moving for adventure. Maybe you're moving to get away from politics in the country that you're in. Maybe you're moving to not have to worry about healthcare so much. There could be a million reasons why you might consider a move abroad, and maybe it's multiple reasons. But I think it's to think about what your main priorities are for you. So you think about your career. Do I want remote work? Am I looking for local employment, entrepreneurship? Maybe for your lifestyle you might be considering, am I looking for a big city or a small town? Does walkability matter a lot to me and not having a car? Do I want public transportation? Do I want beach access? Maybe you want to think about the community. Are there a lot of expats? Do I want to have deep local integration, which I think you should have? Is it an English-speaking environment, and is that important to me? Do I wanna make sure there is, a good community of English-speaking people, but I can also learn the local language? And I think community is one of the pieces that people don't realize how important it is. When I first moved to London, obviously London is very diverse. And when I first moved to London, I remember meeting this American girl who was also from Texas, and I met her in the first two weeks of moving to London. And she was like wanting to engage and be friends. And I was like, girl, I just moved away from a country full of Americans. I'm not looking to make friends with other Americans. I want something exciting. I wanna be friends with people from New Zealand, which I ended up building a really big New Zealand community for a while, and Australia and other European countries and British people. I don't wanna be friends with other Americans. But the longer I've been in London, the more I crave actually being friends with people from Texas and being friends with Americans because I realize that we get along really well because we're really similar, and we probably grew up in a very similar environment. So I actually click really well with Americans, but I love having a mix of both. And what I would really encourage you to do, and I think that this piece is often missed by people, is you want to make sure there is a lot of expats. You wanna make sure there are people that are from other countries because if you're moving to a small town where there's only people from Germany, for instance, and you're moving to a small German town, it's going to be a little bit difficult to integrate into the country and to feel a sense of belonging because The thing that's gonna help you settle the fastest is to build community, and you'll build community faster with other people that are similar-minded to you. Hence, a lot of expats. A lot of expats also are wanting to build community, also wanna build friendships, also are looking for connection. And a lot of times they have a similar mindset because they've also moved abroad and also picked up their life. And so a lot of times they have like a similar personality, and you'll click a lot better with them. Whereas local people, sometimes they might have been friends with their same community, same friends since they were in primary school, since they were like five years old. So sometimes it's a little bit different to integrate or to build friendships with local people, and it really depends on the culture that you're moving to, the country that you're moving to, for sure, and it also really depends on the culture of that city itself. Because Lisbon, Portugal might be really open, whereas a smaller city in Portugal might be a little bit more difficult to integrate into. So I think that, I don't wanna get too deep into this, but community is super, super important for you to feel a sense of belonging, and it helps you to settle faster than anything else. So whenever you're picking your location abroad, I would highly recommend you make sure that there are other expats. They don't have to be from the US or from the country that you're from. But I would highly encourage you to be friends or to make sure that there are people from other countries. So you wanna make sure there is an expat community as well as, you wanna make local friends as well. So I would just keep that in mind whenever you're looking for your country and city abroad community is really important. And then lastly, in our category of, starting with the life instead of just the country itself is travel. Are you looking for easy access to get around Europe? Are you looking for global flights? Are you looking for maybe a place where you can explore domestically a lot easier? So I think that once you know the life that you want and the important pieces to you, like what you're really looking for, if it's like a stronger, job opportunities, stronger career opportunities, then probably like Northern European countries are a better fit. If you really are prioritizing like sunshine and beaches and like a slower lifestyle, then probably Southern European countries are a better fit. So I think it's just figuring out what is the most important to you and starting with the life, and then figuring out which country fits your priorities the most Mistake number four that I see people making is ignoring the visa reality. This is a huge one, and not a really fun one to talk about, but a lot of people are asking themselves, like, "What's the best country?" But sometimes the better question is, "Which countries are realistically available to me?" And I think that this is important to talk about because sometimes we might be thinking like, "Oh, I wanna retire abroad in the UK." But actually, the UK doesn't have a retirement visa, so it's really difficult to do that. So I think sometimes you have to think about what am I looking for in terms of the work or how I'm making money. Is it being a student? Is it being a freelancer? Is it having a full-time job? And figuring out which countries will allow you to build that life because not every country has a remote working visa, not every country has a freelancing visa. You have to think about, what fits you're looking for. You need to think about what country has the right visa that fits the lifestyle of how I'm going to make money abroad that I'm looking for. So someone may dream of Switzerland but may not have a realistic visa pathway for what they're looking for. Maybe another person might overlook Portugal or Spain despite having a really clear visa path and an easier path to be able to get there. So I think you need to be thinking about the visa reality and looking into that alongside looking at countries. I would not recommend going down the rabbit hole of looking into every visa and all the eligibility requirements. But to realize probably number one, what type of work am I going to do? Am I planning on getting a remote job and having a digital nomad visa? Am I planning on being a freelancer and getting a freelance visa? Am I planning on being a student, and am I planning on getting a work visa and having a full-time job through employment? And to look at the countries that you might be considering and seeing if they have the visa category that you really need, and to make sure that visa pathway is realistic for you. Because different countries have different levels of easiness probably to get into and depending on the visa that you want to get. So I think that mistake number four that people make is ignoring that visa reality so now let's talk about a framework for how you should actually choose a country to move abroad to, to figure out what is the best fit for you. So I'd say step number one of how to actually choose the right country abroad is to first decide, why am I moving abroad? What is the biggest reason that I'm moving abroad? And will this country abroad and city abroad fit that goal? Is it to strengthen your career? Then you might wanna choose a country that has a really strong job market. Is it for doing freelance work? You might want to make sure that country and city has the freelance visa that you need. You might be thinking, I want to move abroad to get away from politics. Then make sure you're moving to a country that does not have horrible, heavy political issues. So I think that you would just need to think about the lifestyle that you're wanting, and then figure out which countries might fit that potential lifestyle that you are looking for. I think step number two would be, which visa options do I qualify for, to make sure that the country that you're planning on moving to actually does have the visa that you need for the type of work that you're planning on doing. If you're gonna be a student, pretty much every country has a student visa. But if you're thinking, I wanna work full time, how easy is it to get a work visa, for instance? Or if I wanna be a freelancer or be a digital nomad, do they have a digital nomad visa? So you'll wanna make sure there are visa options that you qualify for as step number two. Step three would be to ask yourself what countries and cities fit exactly what I'm looking for in terms of the lifestyle that I'm looking for that has the visa options that I would need, and that I would qualify to be able to move abroad. What countries and cities fit that? And then step number four, I would suggest doing a test drive abroad in the cities that you are considering moving abroad to. I haven't mentioned this, but this is also a consideration. Sometimes we think about what's practical, A, B, C, D. Like we do step one, two, three, four. But a lot of times moving abroad, it's emotional, right? You might have the exact city that you want to move abroad to, or you know the country that you have to move to, but you're trying to figure out the city. So I think it is emotional, but you'll just wanna make sure that where you are envisioning yourself moving abroad to, where you're dreaming about, does fit the lifestyle that you're looking for so that you can have a successful move abroad. And that's what I really wanna help you with. I want you to have a successful move abroad into somewhere that you're happy with, and not just somewhere that felt really good on vacation, but then in actuality, whenever you move there, you aren't happy, and you're not building a life that you love. So that's the goal here. So I would recommend, as a step number one, again, is to figure out what type of life you want. What are your priorities for the country and city that you're moving to? Step number two is to make sure that there are visa options that you can qualify for that fit the lifestyle that you're looking for, that fit, what type of employment you're planning on doing or building a business or being a student or building freelance work or whatever that looks like for you. And step number four is to test drive that specific city that you've been dreaming about or a few cities that you might be considering so that you make sure you're choosing the best country and the best city for you and the life that you're planning on building abroad So if you've been researching countries and cities for months, and you've been going down the rabbit hole, stop for just a moment and ask yourself, "Am I choosing a country based on what looks really exciting or what supports the life that I actually really want to build?" And if you're still trying to figure out which European country and city might be the best fit for you, I've actually created a quiz that helps match you with the country and city based on your goals, your lifestyle, your priorities, and what fits your vibe. So if you're interested in taking the quiz, you can go take it at the bottom of the podcast description. If you just go to the description, you'll see something about the quiz, or you can also go to jordangiberson.com/quiz and take it there. It only takes a couple minutes, and then you'll get to reveal what the quiz says in terms of the best city abroad for you and what matches you. So it might be interesting and a good little tool to test out where you should be moving to fit your lifestyle and your goals. But if not, I would just encourage you not to just go too deep into the rabbit hole of research, but to think about what are your priorities, what fits you best, and is it possible to move there for you? So I hope that you found this episode helpful, and thank you so much for listening to another episode of the Move Abroad podcast. I will catch you here again next week, same time, same place. I'll catch you then.